Things that Go Bump in the Night

So yesterday as we were driving through Gonzales, which, btw, has the most photogenic jail ever, I see a Golden Chick.

"Preston, there is a fucking Golden fucking Chick."

For those who don't know, Golden Chick has the Best.Chicken.EVER.

"That is a fucking Golden Chick!! Do you wanna eat there?"

For those who don't know, there are no Golden Chicks in H-town.

"Ummm, YEAH!!! BEST CHICKEN EVER!!!!"

So we ate at Golden Chick.

Did you know that when you've been eating heathily for 6 months in an attempt to lose weight for your wedding that fast food doesn't taste as good any more? I did, but I conveniently forgot it for the Golden Chick. Did you know that sometimes said fast food will actually be rejected by your body due to its yummy nastiness? I did. Also conveniently forgotten. Until last night. When the vomititis arrived.

Combined with the fact that our room had two doors: one to enter and a connecting door (thus disabling my normal plan of positioning Preston as monster bait), my sleep was fitful.

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We Interrupt Your Irregularly Scheduled Blog For a Public Service Announcement

Last night's scenario:

I'm laying in bed wondering if I can expell this whole chicken from my stomach. The two doors kept distracting me. The bed was huge, so Preston was on the other side of a protective wall he had erected of pillows between us. But I had finally managed to fall into a sort of fitful frequently waking crappy-ass sleep.

Bi-boom, buh-boom, bi-boom, buh-boom...

WTF?????

Then the moaning started.

Seriously. The people in the room above us were doing It. Loudly. In the room above us. At 1:36am.

Some background: This hotel in BFE, Texas was so empty that we were allowed to pick whether we wanted an upstairs room or a downstairs room.

This is your public service announcement: If you are planning on banging, if you regularly get laid, or if you even have the remotest fancy of fucking, please select the DOWNSTAIRS option. Please. Oh, and teach the bitch to scream into a pillow. These walls and floors are paper thin.

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Shittiest sleep EVER.

Now I'm gone for two weeks. For real.