So I had an interesting response when I freaked out about my Dad.
I couldn't... deal.
But I've never been in a place where I couldn't deal AND I've had a Kid. And a job.
I couldn't fall into depression, but I was there. I was on the edge. But I knew I needed to keep doing my job and keep being a mom, and I didn't know how to do that while I was freaking out.
My solution was to check out, mentally.
What does that mean, and how did I accomplish that, exactly? Well, like the good librarian I am, I turned to books. In the last 2 weeks, I've read 20, count them, 20, fluffy, formulaic romance novels. Why romance novels, you ask? Simple: they always have a happy ending. And they usually grab me enough to make me care, at least a bit (even as I'm getting annoyed at the never-ending repetition of the formula), and while I'm doing everything in my power to get myself to the next break in my life where I can read, I'm not thinking about my Dad.
And it worked.
And I promised myself that after Monday I'd quit and go back to reading the stuff I should be reading. So I have, but I wanted to acknowledge what I've been doing, and also to get it down here, because it *worked*.
2 comments:
Been there--no time for depression, too many people counting on me.
We need to have lunch together.
I'd love lunch. Maybe a Wednesday at the Market?
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